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Plook
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A family was taking a cross country camping trip and accidently stopped at a nudist camp but decided to stay.
The young son decided to walk around and when he returned, he told his mom the girls all had huge boobs, the mom said the bigger they are the dumber
they are.
The next day the son walked around when he returned, he told the mom the guys all have big ding-a-lings, remember the mom said the bigger they are the
dumber they are.
The third day the son walked around and when he returned, he told his mom dad is talking to a really really dumb girl and dad keeps getting dumber and
dumber the longer he talks to her…
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BBP
Super Administrator
Posts: 8155
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Location: Eindhoven, Netherlands
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Last year, I had a great joke about inflation. But it’s hardly worth it now.
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ursinator2.0
Sheik Yerbouti Status
Posts: 349
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Mood: in between  and 
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Just another facebook finding:
 
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tinkamok
Apostrophe Status
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I have the edition of "The Adventures Of Fat Freddy's Cat " that strip is taken from Book 2 .
The cartoonist , Gilbert Shelton was in Plymouth signing copies of his work and i have a couple of signed editions of "The Fabulous Furry Freak
Brothers" .
Also a signed copy of "Philbert Desanex' 100,00th Dream" with a little hand drawn cartoon in the front cover .
"Music is the only religion that delivers the goods" F.Z.
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BBP
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From the Jokes I Don't Get corner:
Two buffalo overheard a passing tourist say, "What scroungy, miserable beasts those are." One buffalo asked the other, "Did you hear a discouraging
word?"
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polydigm
King Kong Status
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Quote: Originally posted by BBP  | From the Jokes I Don't Get corner:
Two buffalo overheard a passing tourist say, "What scroungy, miserable beasts those are." One buffalo asked the other, "Did you hear a discouraging
word?" |
It's about a traditional song from the American West.
"Oh, give me a home where the buffalo roam,
Where the deer and the antelope play,
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word
And the skies are not cloudy all day."
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BBP
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I know that. In Toonstruck the parody is "Where seldom is heard an intelligible word, and the mango and diesel souffle."
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Eddie RUKidding
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South of the Border
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BBP
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It's called "Home on deranged."
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polydigm
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So why is it from the jokes you don’t get corner?
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Eddie RUKidding
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No Cobbs allowed 
South of the Border
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BBP
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I don't know the original, only the mango and diesel.
Diesel in this part of the world is when you mix Coke with Fanta (or whatever cheapo variety you use of the sugarfairy bathwater). It's possible to
cook soda into syrup that you then use for baking (GBBO) so making a mango and diesel souffle should be possible.
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BBP
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Grunt time!
"Waitress, may I ask you about the menu, please?" "Sir, the men I please are none of your business!"
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polydigm
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I heard a good golf joke recently:
You're playing a round of golf with your friend and you've reached the eighteenth hole and you're dead even. You tee off a 200m drive right up the
middle of the fairway, but friend drives into the woods. You help him look for the ball, but can't find it. The friend says go and take your second
shot, I'll look a bit more and if I can't find, I'll go and tee off again. You take your second shot and it lands on the green, a significant distance
from the pin. Suddenly you hear, "I found it!!" from the woods and next thing a ball comes flying up and lands about 30cms from the hole. Now, what do
you do? Do you take his ball out of your pocket and let him know what a cheating bastard he is, or do you just let it go?
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Plook
Joe's Garage Status
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Good one Poly...
This actually happened when I was golfing on the Central Coast a couple of years ago and Kat was with me.
I am playing in a foursome of people the starter put together we had been playing for several holes together so everyone was loosened up.
We were standing on the tee box getting ready to tee off, this older guy that had to be in his seventies says "do you know why they call it Golf?"
We all look around and shrug, so we are expecting some historical background and he says "because fuck was taken"...oh my god we almost died
laughing...
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BBP
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When you go to the hairdresser, there's always hair on the floor. When you go to a mechanic, there's oil and screws on the floor. But when I go to the
bank...
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BBP
Super Administrator
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"Mom, is it okay if my boyfriend and I go up to my room?" "Sure, Honey. You kids have fun." Soon, Mom heard, "Baby, baby, baby, oh!" She knocks on the
bedroom door and asked, "What's going on in there!?" Her daughter replied, "Mom! We're just having sex." "Oh, thank God. I was afraid you were
listening to Justin Bieber
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Plook
Joe's Garage Status
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A DEA officer stopped at our farm yesterday, he said “I need to inspect your farm for illegal growing of drugs.”
I said “Okay, but don’t go in that field over there.”
The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me!”
Reaching into his rear pants pocket, the arrogant officer removed his badge and shoved it in my face. “See this badge?! This badge means I am
allowed to go wherever I wish…. On any land!! No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear?…. do you understand?!!”
I nodded politely, apologized, and went about my chores.
A short time later, I heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by my big old mean bull…. With every
step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was
clearly terrified.
I threw down my tools, ran to the fence, and yelled at the top of my lungs
“Your badge, show him your badge 🤣🤣
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Eddie RUKidding
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^ winner & ^^winner again for both posts
South of the Border
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BBP
Super Administrator
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Why is Elon Musk's Christmas dinner so awkward?
He can't stop talking about his X.
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