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BBP
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Only saw a segment of it in history class, during the introduction week when some historical movies were discussed (among them Barry Lyndon, The
Longest Day, and Blackadder (1st series)). Apparently historically it kind of blows.
Gladiators fought naked in those days. That would make a great movie!!
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scallopino
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I guess when you watch it the first time within some kind of analytical framework like that it kind of affects you every other time you see it. If I
knew it wasn't historically accurate I probably wouldn't have liked it as much.
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BBP
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That for me also goes for "laws of nature". No more action films for me!
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BBP
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Today I nearly sat through the Emperor's New Groove. Disney only turns to anachronisms for its laughs. Baah.
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BBP
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On Christmas I sat through Mad Money, something about three women who work for a bank in Kansas that destroys money, and who decide to rob a lot of
it.
And a day after I sat through Muppets Treasure Island, with a lot of failing jokes and nasty songs, but fortunately with Tim Curry.
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scallopino
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I remember going to see that Muppet movie when I was little. I think my grandmother took me and my sister.
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MTF
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Mamma Mia. My wife rented it the other night, and after ten minutes I was ready to stick knitting needles in my eyes just to get out of watching the
rest of it.
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Pappawas1975
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| Quote: | Originally posted by MTF
Mamma Mia. My wife rented it the other night, and after ten minutes I was ready to stick knitting needles in my eyes just to get out of watching the
rest of it. |
I would rather eat my own shitthan watch that....
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BBP
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Poor MTF! Are you still married?
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MTF
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| Quote: | Originally posted by BBP
Poor MTF! Are you still married? |
Yes. In fact, our sixteenth anniversary is Wednesday (yes: New Year's Eve).
She puts up with my shit, so I think it's only fair that I tolerate her bad taste in movies.
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scallopino
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Fair enough. I would never go near that movie. Apart from the general idea of it, I really can't stand Pierce Brosnan as a human being. What do you
think of Abba in general MTF? I rather like them...but I remember that Bonny does not.
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BBP
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What's wrong with Pierce Brosnan then?
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scallopino
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I never really liked him anyway, but then this started to get played on tv non-stop.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14XWoZeuwK0&feature=related
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DED
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After watching the dutch movies "night of the wild donkeys" and "an Amsterdam tale" I wonder if the Dutch should make movies.
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BBP
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Karakter fortunately disproved that. I believe in most countries the good-film-bad-film ratio is very low.
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BBP
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So until today I would have illustrated how big my Tim Curry-fanhood is by saying: "I sat through Barbie and The Nutcracker for Tim Curry!"
But now I'd say: "I sat through Scary Movie 2 for Tim Curry!" Good God. How could ANYONE see that script and then want to have anything to do with it?
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BBP
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I sat through the first 40 minutes of "4 Dogs Playing Poker", again for Tim Curry. My recent art knowledge butchered it slightly, when I noticed the
Degas statuette they were stealing was obviously fake (wrong height and wearing a skirt). Plus there was also a Rembrandt in the room, which they left
there.
But that was not my first beef with it. That was when one of Curry's first lines: "If you drop that ice statue I will slay your first-born!" was
translated to "...I will castrate you on the spot!"
Also troublesome was witnessing Curry's character (I think he was called Felix. I didn't even bother to remember the names of the 4 main characters)
WRAPPING THE STOLEN DEGAS IN A NEWSPAPER... ON THE STREET where everyone could see it.
Then he put the flimsy wrapped statue on the crate at the loading point of the boat, talked some to the guy dealing with shipments, then WENT AWAY,
then DISCOVERED the statuette was gone, then SIGNED for having handed it over. 
During a nasty confrontation with the people who gave out the assignment, he was shot, and for some reason we had to witness how his wound was dealt
with. 
And then, when he was hung and his legs were cut off, there was no more fun in it for me. I couldn't care less about the real bad lines and about the
characters (I only knew the name of one of the four main ones) so I saved myself an hour and switched it off. Gawd.
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BBP
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OK, that's it... I'll have to be careful with the Curry now.
Today I watched Barbie and the Three Musketeers. It ranks below Nutcracker.
Why? Well... let's list the pluses:
-Tim Curry. Great to see he has a good-looking character, and his acting was not bad (although he did seem to wonder what happened to him to deserve
that role)
-Rotoscope animation of human characters was quite good
-Halfway I was treated to an instrumental of EMF's Unbelievable, a song with a riff I adore.
Minuses:
-Hideous songs
-EMF's Unbelievable returned towards the end... in a "girlie" edition, changing the lyrics from bad-girlfriend-bashing to GRRL POWER.
-Although the human movements were realistic, the physical "acting", particularly of the female characters, is far from it. The main characters often
look like they're working out with Jane Fonda.
-Bad colour scheme, overly bright and huge slabs of one colour, making grassy fields look like sheets of paper.
-Animation of animals is very poor. The cat, horse and dog are often walking seemingly in thin air.
-Items defy the laws of nature. Particularly the shattered glass of the chandelier and the weapons of the ladies. Deadly fans and ribbons look even
more curious than they sound, particularly when swords fail to cut through them.
-While Nutcracker had some terrific dialogue, the jokes in Musketeers are limited to Mus-CAT-teers (as outed by Barbie's pet cat) repeated several
times. The "bad guy"'s only sneer at Barbie is when he refers to her as "Blondie".
-Anachronisms... An Disneyland castle in Paris... gee. The Kung Fu Athletic Fighting... list is endless.
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BBP
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Tried to watch 4 Dogs Playing Poker again, since I have all the time of the world now. I got about one scene further. Man it's awful!
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BBP
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Finished it today. Now to make a continuation of the problems:
There seem to have been multiple writers at play, and it shows. One has any character cursing like a blue streak, primarily using the F-word to a
ridiculous degree.
Another one is trying to get "in depth". This one even puts in a little silly love scene, and a drooly ending. It doesn't work, since the film is
essentially character-less, all the actors are portraying puppets. Getting "meaningful close-ups" doesn't work without any characters.
Part of the lack of characters is in the bad writing: character have no past, no relations, nothing. It's also partly because of the bad acting, by
any of the major characters.
There's disturbing discontinuity: eg although Curry plays an obvious Brit and has to travel BA to correspond with his nationality, his passport says
he's American, born in the US, and residing in the US.
The eventual "climax" scene has a moving corpse without cause, reason or logic.
Whew, now that that is out of my system...
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